Hurting for prayer

"continuing steadfastly in prayer"

Romans 12:12

Do you know anyone with chronic health problems?  I know a few.  I suppose, in a way, that includes everyone.  Who doesn't know someone who suffers from headaches, back trouble, arthritis or asthma?  I used to know someone with multiple sclerosis, but we've lost track of each other.  I still think of her sometimes, and wonder how she's doing.  And I have a friend with fibromyalgia, and a friend who gets recurring migraines, and another friend who has been troubled by gout more than once, and two friends who struggle with muscle or joint pain.  Not arthritis, really, but something like it. 

One of these friends, when explaining her affliction, always says, "It's not something you die from; it's something you learn to live with."

That line has struck with me for years, because I think it's true of a lot of life.  We all have something, physical or emotional, that we have to learn to live with. 

But it's one thing to be someone who has a chronic health problem.  It's something else to be the friend of someone with a chronic health problem.  That can be a tricky line to walk.  Being understanding without ever being irritated that you always have to do all the driving.  Or being concerned enough to ask how they're feeling, without ever making them think "how come no one ever talks about anything but my condition?" 

Recently I had a learning experience with one of these friends, I'll call her Susannah, cuz I love that name.  We were with some other friends, a couple of them new to our group.  And Susannah was in a little bit of pain, which is not unusual.  It's not a lot of pain.  She rarely even mentions it, but she was walking a little slower than usual on that day, and one of the new gals ~ I'll call her Cornelia, cuz I love that name, too but my husband hated it, so there was no chance I was ever going to get to name a daughter that.  I love old-fashioned names.  The Apple of my Eye ~ not so much.  My Awesome Girl is very grateful to my husband for his stubbornness.  He probably would have agreed to "Susannah" for our girl, but we didn't think it sounded good with our last name.

At any rate, Cornelia noticed, and asked if she was alright.   Susannah replied with a brief explanation of her problem, very low-key and offhand, just as she always is about it. 

Cornelia's response was ~ I'm ashamed to say ~ surprising to me.  She asked Susannah if she could pray for her, and then she did.  And it made me realize how long it has been since I prayed for Susannah.  I think it has come to be no big deal for me ~ just as she always makes it seem whenever anyone asks about it.  But in becoming so nonchalant about it, I think I became callous to it.

I not only don't pray for her to be healed from it ~ like I've just decided God's never going to do that ~ I also don't pray for her symptoms to be mild, and I don't pray for her sleep to be good, and I don't pray for her to have His strength when she feels weak. 

In Luke 18, Jesus told the parable of the persistent widow, and verse 1 says that parable is a lesson, "that men always ought to pray and not lose heart."  I think that "losing heart" means giving up on a prayer ever getting an answer, but is it any better to decide that someone else doesn't need prayer?  That they are doing just fine in their affliction, or in their trial? 

I've been friends with Susannah for years, but I'm realizing now I could be a much better friend to her.

~ "as for me, far be it from me

that I should sin against the Lord

in ceasing to pray for you" ~

1 Samuel 12:23