Thursday, April 4, 2013

Successful Failure

"my relatives have failed"
Job 19:14

My hubby and kids ran some errands a few weeks ago.  I would have gone, too, but I had someplace I had to be.

Which is fortunate for me, because they were going to a couple of places, one of which I hate going.  It's a ginormous superstore that takes more patience to maneuver than I have.

Do you know that the British spell it "manoeuvre"?  You might, if you're British....  Love that spelling.

But I needed a few things from said superstore.  Or rather, I knew it would be an inexpensive place to buy them.  So I told the Apple of my Eye what I needed.  When I got home that evening, he had bought them, but he'd gotten the wrong thing.  Both times. 

In the first case, they didn't have exactly what I wanted.  So he pretty much knew he was bringing home the wrong thing, but he figured it was the next best thing. 

The other thing he bought, was a craft item I needed, that he wasn't familiar with.  So he looked, but wasn't sure what to buy.  So he asked my Awesome Girl if she knew what I wanted.  She looked, too, and picked the one she thought was the kind I used. 

She was wrong. 

But to be fair, I'm not sure they had what I wanted in that case either.  She told me afterwards that she looked at the choices, and thought, "Well, I know Mom doesn't want that one."  And she picked one of the others.  So it could be that they didn't even have the one I wanted.

I felt so appreciative of the effort they had gone to.  And I felt a little bit bad that it had turned out to be difficult.  The idea of them standing in the aisle of the, um, gigantic supermart, looking at each other, and shrugging and thinking and trying and guessing... They wanted to do what I asked them, and when they realized they couldn't, they did their very best.

I sometimes feel that same sense of frustration that they felt, when I'm trying to please God.  I feel like I don't know what exactly what He wants from me, so I guess, and I hope it's what He wanted. 

But I think He feels toward me, the way I feel about them ~ pleased that they tried.  He knows our hearts, and He knows when we are seeking to do His will, and when we're just doing what we want.  It brings me comfort, when I fail, to know that He knows that I tried my best. 

~ "Let the words of my mouth
and the meditation of my heart
Be acceptable in Your sight,
O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer " ~
Psalm 19:14

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