"you too will be judged"
I took my Awesome Girl for a haircut today. It's been awhile since either of us got a haircut. It's one of the things we've been cutting back on (so to speak) during these lean times. But her hair was driving her crazy ~ probably most of you know what that's like ~ so I'd made an appointment for her.
The appointment was for this morning, and I slept later than I normally do. I'm pretty regular in my gettin-up time (was that a song? Gettin-Up Time? All of a sudden that's ringing a bell. Maybe something when my kids were little. I dunno...) Anyhow, I get up at almost the same time every day, without the benefit of an alarm, but once in awhile, I think my body catches up on my sleep.
So while we weren't in a rush, I really only had time to get dressed, have some breakfast, tidy my hair and dust a little powder on my face. I looked fine, but I didn't look my best. And normally that wouldn't bother me for just running errands, but this was different. Cuz the stylist that cuts my daughter's hair is my stylist, too. So I was very aware that my hair didn't look great. Plus, I've been cutting my own bangs for the past few months. Stylists hate that... Does yours offer to cut yours for free, if you'll just come in? Mine does. But going in just for that seems like such a big deal.... I guess I should really think about that, though....
Obviously I felt my hair was decent enough for me to be seen in public, but I was embarrassed that my stylist (is that the right word? That sounds so fashionista. All she does is cut my hair. I don't even have her dry it, much less style it. But calling her "my hair-cutter" doesn't right. What? I'm over-analyzing? Yeah, I do that sometimes...) Anyhow, I was embarrassed that someone that knows a lot about hair, was seeing my hair at less than its best, and I was worried that she'd judge me.
I have no reason to think she would, really. Even when I go in for an appointment, and it's obvious to her that I've been trimming my own bangs, she never says a thing. Generally I'll say, "Sorry. I caved and cut my bangs myself." And she'll quietly say, "I know." But that's it. She's a very sweet, very nice gal. And I love how well she trims my sometimes-curly-sometimes-wavy-always-with-a-mind-of-its-own hair.
But judgment is a tricky thing. It is so easy for us to judge others. Especially in areas where we excel. Is it just about noticing things that we are interested in? Or are we trying to make ourselves feel better about ourselves, by pointing out to ourselves (or to others) the things that are wrong with the people around us? My fear that I'm being judged makes me wonder if I'm too judgmental. Matthew 7:2 says, "in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." That ought to make us nervous. It ought to make us think twice about analyzing, or coming to conclusions on others.
I know that God is the ultimate Judge. James 4:12 says "There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you - who are you to judge your neighbor?" I probably would do better to think less about what others think of me, and more about how pleased ~ or displeased ~ He is with me.
~ "Examine me, O Lord, and prove me;
try my mind and my heart" ~